April 14, 2022 was the day we were excitedly waiting for since we knew we were pregnant. It was the day that you were due to enter this world. We knew you would come before due to being high risk, but this day was your expected special day. How much would you weigh, how long would you be, how long would labor be, would you be in Nicu or in our room from the start? It was a day we always imagined would be filled with happiness, excitement and joy. We had so many dreams and hopes for you and what life would be like as a family of four. Watching you and Jordyn grow up together was what we were most excited about. Would you look just like her? Blond, grey eyes, dimples? Would you be as easy going as she was as a baby or were you going to be the polar opposite? We were ready to be exhausted due to having an infant and toddler and were filled with such anticipation. We talked about the first year and all the firsts, your Easter which we brought such a cute shirt for Jordyn to wear. It said “Will trade brother for Easter eggs” gosh how that stings now… your first vacation down in LBI, our first vacation to Vermont, the cute little pineapple you would be for your first Halloween, your first Thanksgiving and of course your first Christmas. Would we be able to have your first birthday party unlike your sisters which was cancelled due Covid. Would breast feeding start out easier with you, my breasts had been producing milk for awhile and I was so excited to nourish you. Taking walks all Spring with the double stroller. Ensuring that we still spent one on one time with Jordyn because we knew that would be important also. Of course we dreamed further, would you like sports, what would you become in your life and so much more in between. All out hopes and dreams were shattered that dreadful day, March 7 when we heard the worst wordsnof our life. “There is no cardiac activity, he is gone”. Our world came crashing down around us, our hearts in a million pieces and all of our future plans immediately cut short… Your birth was not what we planned, no happy tears, no smiles, no cries from you. Silence, despair, utterly distraught are words that describe that day. You will forever be 4lbs7oz and 17.5inches of perfection. Our brave little lion, our precious son, her little brother… Parker James we will always carry you within our heart and we will ensure that you continue to live on in this world through us… Say his name… Parker James…
April 14, 2022
That was the date
We were expecting you
Another Aries we joked
Making it three
Unfortunately that wouldnt be
Your heart stopped beating
Five weeks before
Devastating us forever more
A “cord accident” they said
Is what led to your death
And left us gasping for breath
Our perfect baby boy
Still, silent, sleeping
Left your mamas weeping
We wish you were here
Safe in our embrace
Your precious beautiful face
We miss you so much
Mama Amanda, Jordyn and Mama Bri
Will love you until eternity
We will speak your name
And tell others all about you our son
Parker James, little precious one
bornperfectlystillbornperfectly 